April
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America can no longer help in disasters
After the earthquake that killed more than two thousand people in Burma Shave, the administration admitted that America no longer possesses the tools to help people in need.
A USAID employee earning $250,000 a year said "since Elon the Destroyer's chain saw destroyed all the agency's tools, we're done. We no longer have any function. So China and Donnie's friend Russia are helping the helpless that Elon, Trump, and Satan ensured we can no longer help."
04/01/2024
Today is Liberation Day!
Today is the day that King Donald the Greedy puts an extra twenty five percent TAX on automobiles, and other TAXES on everything else you buy. A tariff is a TAX! The foreigners don't pay it like King Donnie the Lyin'heart makes it out to be, YOU pay the tax!
Liberation day, when we become liberated from our money!
Hooray?
04/02/2024
The expected stock market meltdown is in progress
Last night when it was daytime in China, China retaliated against King Edward VIII's Donald's import taxes tariffs. After all, stock traders may be stupid and heartless but they can hire brains and psychologists.
The stock market has been tanking all day, just as the space alien from the future said last July 16.
The, er, "action" by the king serves to pay for his tax cuts for himself and his fellow billionaires, the taxes on working people TARIFFS making it possible for these greedy people to become even more filthily and sickeningly rich.
Not exactly the American Way or the least patriotic, but with that much money, who needs patriotism?
04/04/2024
Communist revolution in America!
Yesterday the king said that we are having "an economic revolution." They had an economic revolution in Russia in 1917, and King Donald the Don learned well from his teacher, Master Putitin.
A communist revolution. Both communism and fascism require an authoritarian leader, one man to rule them all. There isn't much difference between the two.
The only hope left for American democracy is a Democratic landslide next year, followed by impeachment for Trump's blatant and wanton ignoring of the Constitution, a guilty verdict, and the assurrance that the wannabe dicktater never has a chance to ruin America again. If not, America is in splinters from the billionaire's chainsaw.
04/06/2024
Does the king read The Nooze?
A couple of days ago we informed you of his plot to Make America Communist Again by destroying its economy and relationship with its friends. Well, today he cancelled his terrorifs, except 10%, and China. The stock market got a couple thousands of its points back. He saw the jig was up?
No, he doesn't read The Nooze, he was just afraid of being tarred and feathered and run out of town on a rail, an old American tradition specifically designed for fraudsters.
04/10/2024
Moreon the terrorifs
In King Don the Dim's trade war against the free world and China, he called off terrorifs on most electronics yesterday.
Some politicians are starting to wake up to the fact that the president doesn't have the constitutional authority to levy terrorifs, that power is reserved for Congress.
The Trump Coup continues. America is in the throes of a hostile takeover by the heritage society (AKA those who inherit great wealth).
04/13/2024
Have you heard the Nooze?
The pope is dead!
You better stay home,
And do as you're told.
Get out of the road if you want to grow old.
What do you get for pretending the danger is real?
Meek and obedient you follow the leader...
What a surprise!
A look of terminal shock in your eyes
Now things are really what they seem
No, this is no bad dream. This is a nightmare.
Donald Trump is the Fuhrer. And you voted for him. And Pink Floyd is suing us.
Sheep © Pink Floyd, used without permission
04/21/2024
Hogshead does it again
Suckretary of De Fence Pete Hogshead was found using Signal yet again, the Russian encryption service to send combat plans that he insists isn't classified, to his wife and brother. Last time he got caught because the Editor in Chief of The Atlantic was mistakenly added.
There were no consequences the first time, so why not?
It seems our country is being defended by a bunch of arrogant, apathetic, incompetent fuckups.
04/23/2024
King Donald the Felon has FBI arrest judge
The FBI arrested a Milwaukee County judge on Friday for allegedly obstructing justice by helping an illegal alien evade arrest. FBI Disrupter Cash Patel broke the news on unsocial media, which was immediately deleted.
The post read "Just NOW, the FBI arrested Judge Hannah Dugan out of Milwaukee, Wisconsin on charges of obstruction -- after evidence of Judge Dugan obstructing an immigration arrest operation last week." He didn't say that the judge only spoke to the alien and did nothing else, or confirm that there is zero chance that the judge will be found guilty.
It's another of King Don the Awful's scare tactics. The Rebelution continues as the Proud Boys and Klan cheer.
In other alien Nooze, Rority, the time traveling space alien from the future, denies that he ever met that judge.
04/25/2024
Update
The deleted antisocial site mentioned in the above post was Twitter, deleted by the Space Nazi Elon Muskrat and renamed "X" a few years ago. X, as in "cross it out".
04/25/2024
Poorly named "Justice" Department exiles American citizens with no due process
The exiled Americans weren't criminals, they were children! Exiled because their mothers were illegal aliens (although nothing like Rority).
The alien mothers were deported, like the king is deporting all foreigners whether here legally or illegally. One would think such xenophobia to be rare, and here we have a xenophobe in the White House.
The American children were exiled despite their American fathers' wishes, who also did not have their day in court. The mothers and kids were whisked away without explanation.
America has its first unamerican president.
04/29/2024
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